The Absolute Worst that Utah Has to Offer
Gary Herbert has appointed Cody Steward, a former lobbyist for the oil and gas industry as his new primary energy adviser. Working to ensure that those in charge of regulating the industry have the best ties to the industry itself, Herbert has replaced Amanda Smith, who will remain at the Department of Environmental Quality, with [...]
Look out your window. Do you notice anything different this morning? Wait a minute… that drunken bacchanalian sex orgy, currently occurring in every single street in every single city in the entire state of Utah… was that there last week? No, it wasn’t. We have Governor Herbert and his sexy agenda to thank for that. [...]
Local lawmakers were caught with a lobbyist groups’ hands down their pants on Thursday with Governor Herbert threatening a veto of passed legislation, a rarity in this state where the Governor rarely challenges legislation except in cases of public outcry. The legislation would require landlords to attend an 8 hour “good landlord” class, ensuring that [...]
Energy development in Utah has been a favorite “go to” for various groups, particularly those on the right. Developing Domestic Sources of Terrorism-Free Energy™ (or something full of hyperbole) means that punching holes in and scraping away layers of the earth are valid and encouraged methods of business here and in other places in the [...]
Happy Halloween, sinners! So you’ve waited until the last minute to find a Halloween costume for your ward’s trunk-or-treat activity tonight – and you can’t wear your mom’s clothes like you did last year, because of the pesky new “no cross-dressing” commandment. Don’t worry – your least favorite Utah blog, Telestial State, is here to [...]
Preface: If anyone reading this is a lawyer, knows a lawyer, or can pretend to be a lawyer (and will work for free) please let us know. Way back on June 2nd, the Doug Wright Show was giving away two plane tickets to Denver. Frontier Airlines had announced a new direct flight from Provo, UT [...]
Like most Americans, you probably read somewhere on the Internet that Congressman Anthony “Wiener” Weiner resigned from Congress yesterday. You were shocked! You were surprised! Then you masturbated to pictures of Anthony “Wiener” Weiner’s wiener, and moved on with your life. Not us! We live for political scandals. In fact, this whole sex scandal got [...]
We sure do love to throw parties here in Utah! Twice a year, Tommy S. Monson invites all his Mormon friends to the LDS Conference Center for a giant slumber party. And we have all sorts of fun outdoor festivals during the summer, such as the Pride Festival, the Utah Arts Festival, and the Unemployed [...]
I have a real journalism degree from a real-ish university. Because of this, since graduating I’ve spent a good portion of my time looking for work. It hasn’t been easy finding a job, which is why I twilight as a sex worker – and even that is getting harder. But now, Governor Herbert wants to abandon [...]
As most of you know, my twin sister Selma and I have worked at the DMV for the past 37 years.* Like most state employees, I don’t work on Fridays. On Tequila Fridays, I use my day off by dressing up as the ghost bride of Donny Osmond, passing out cigarettes and unregistered Twitter usernames [...]