Brigham Young University student Chase Thomas is a tall, slender, fit, handsome young man* who can dance. How do I know he can dance? Because he performed on So You Think You Can Dance? and the judges said “Yes.”
For his performance, Thomas wore what are called “dance shorts” – tight, form-fitting, really short shorts commonly worn by dancers – and nothing else. I’m no dancer, but I’m sure they wear these for various reasons: minimal restriction to movement, to better display their physique and lines**, and to show off their rocking bodies. It seems like a reasonable thing, akin to other costumes or uniforms worn in various artistic performances or sporting events.
Well, BYU caught wind of this obscene atrocity. And while it’s unclear whether anyone at the Honor Code Office actually saw Thomas’ performance (either when it first aired or afterward), it is clear that Thomas was called into the Honor Code Office for “some counseling” – which means they told him to stop being gay.
You see, BYU’s Honor Code maintains a “Might Be Gay” list, which they update regularly. All male dancers are on there by default; so when Thomas showed up on national television in those booty shorts, the HC had to take action. They thought, “No straight man would ever wear that attire … and we already know he dances … so he’s definitely gay.”
In the end, he wasn’t kicked out of school and isn’t facing any disciplinary action. However, when he was interviewed for the story by Fox13 News, he had a beard. For those of you who aren’t familiar with the BYU Gestapo Honor Code, it’s against the rules for men to have facial hair (other than a pedo-stache).
So he should be expecting another call and another meeting with the people at the Honor Code, telling him to get rid of that manly beard.
*No homo.
**Disclaimer: I have no idea what dance people are talking about when they mention their “lines.”