Mormon Church Realizes Some of Its Leaders are Democrats

Harry Reid will burn in hell.

Mormons hate Democrats, and it’s obvious why. Democrats are okay with the evil practice of raising taxes, funds which then go to their bishop their government who can then divvy them out as needed via church government welfare programs. Democrats naively support free agency an individual’s ability to decide whether or not they should get [...]

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Jon Huntsman Has Balls the Size of the Statue of Liberty

Statue of Liberty

Jon Huntsman announced in a speech yesterday that he is running for the President of the Mormon United States. There are now two horrible GOP Presidential candidates who belong to the LDS Church. That means there is a 200% chance that our next President will be a Mormon (thus saith the Lord). And what happens [...]

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Utah Voters Are Sooooo Tired of Old People

Chaffetz

Don’t worry everyone, an 86-year old man has been released from the hospital!!! Neat! On to the next story. According to a recent Deseret News/KSL-TV poll,* only 38% of registered voters want to keep Old Man Hatch in his Senate seat. The remaining 114% of voters want Jason Chaffetz to become the next Mormon Senator [...]

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Doug Wright Owes Us Two Plane Tickets to Denver

doug-wright-lied

Preface: If anyone reading this is a lawyer, knows a lawyer, or can pretend to be a lawyer (and will work for free) please let us know. Way back on June 2nd, the Doug Wright Show was giving away two plane tickets to Denver. Frontier Airlines had announced a new direct flight from Provo, UT [...]

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FRIDAY POLL: What Utah politician is the most likely to become involved with a sex scandal?

Jason Chaffetz

Like most Americans, you probably read somewhere on the Internet that Congressman Anthony “Wiener” Weiner resigned from Congress yesterday. You were shocked! You were surprised! Then you masturbated to pictures of Anthony “Wiener” Weiner’s wiener, and moved on with your life. Not us! We live for political scandals. In fact, this whole sex scandal got [...]

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Romney Earns Big Endorsement

Mitt Romney grabbed my ass.

A Presidential campaign is all about building support. You want support from your constituents, other politicians, prominent public figures, and even candidates who have dropped out of the race. Well, Mittens Romney has earned a huge endorsement on his way to becoming the next Mormon Commander in Chief. I’m not talking about the bump he got [...]

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